balance this!

January 23, 2010 - 3 Responses

I know we’re in difficult financial times but since when did the primary purpose of the Church become a balanced budget? Since when did the Great Commission call us to “go therefore and bring people into the church so as to meet our budget?”  Why are we wiling to discuss ad nauseum at every board meeting the need for new people to bring in more money, but not interested in the needs of our community or <gasp> actual evangelism?  If all you want is increased membership and the corresponding dues, the church doesn’t need a minister but a cruise director.

West Coast Pastor


essentials of faith fail

October 7, 2009 - Leave a Response

Hey asshole, who started his own non-profit ministry,

Just because I don’t believe in your “essentials” of the faith doesn’t mean that I DENY CHRIST! Way to respect and care for where I am on the journey. I also appreciate that you brought this up in the midst of a ecumenical youth workers “support” group meeting. I have never felt less supported by you.

Thank you, other members in attendance for stopping the conversation/argument between me and the asshole (which also could classify me). You (OTHER MEMBERS) are the reason that I continue to come to these meetings remembering that even though we come from different traditions and theologies that we support one another through the ups and downs of ministry.

I look forward to our future meetings.

A minister from Oregon

UPDATE: After claiming that I am a false teacher and that I DENY CHRIST my super-christian friend, who…as we remember…began his own non-profit para-church youth ministry, (I guess younglife, on track, the mega church, and ten million church plants in town just weren’t getting the TRUTH out there). Took it upon himself to email the moderator and vice moderator of the presbytery to express his concern that my beliefs were contrary to my denomination (which btw he was “saved” in a church in my denomination (even though that language is rarely used in my denomination)…so he loves and respects their beliefs…or something).

Anyway, thanks a lot for really trying to screw up any chance I have of getting ordained. Thanks for talking to me, thanks for talking to my supervisor, thanks for taking the time to listen to what I am saying as opposed to what you are hearing, thanks for taking the time to figure out that my theology is smack dab in the middle of classical Reformed theology, thanks for making my job harder in a community where people are skeptical of Christianity, thanks for caring for me in a Christ like way, thanks for your concern that I am leading youth astray from Christ, thanks for linking an opinion piece from a denomination publication that has no tie to my presbytery (that I actually agree with and states my beliefs to a tee), thanks for taking the time to understand the polity of my denomination and understanding that the moderator and vice moderator don’t decide who is or is not ordained, thanks for helping me remember that I am called to love all of God’s creatures even if it’s hard, thanks for doing your level best to sabotage my ministry.

Karma is a bitch…wait is that heretical? There I go again…maybe he is on to something…nah!

How To Tell You’re in the Wrong Volunteer Job

October 3, 2009 - Leave a Response

If the pastor forwards emails to you from church members exclaiming how you’re not doing your job, you’re in the wrong volunteer position.

If church members seem to roll their eyes, shift in their chairs, and tap on the table when you’re giving your report at the Quarterly Business Meeting, you’re in the wrong volunteer position.

If the pastor asks to revise your emails and reports before you send them to the congregation, you’re in the wrong volunteer position.

If the Coordinating Council decides to limit the number of years a person can hold a your job, you’re in the wrong volunteer position.

If the entire church votes to ask for the resignation of all the volunteers, simply to get you out of your position, you’re in the wrong volunteer position.

A minister from Virginia

wealth gap

October 2, 2009 - 2 Responses

Dear Church Members,

Remember when you were a kid and you thought your teacher lived at the school? You’d be so shocked if you saw her out at A&P shopping for groceries or something. Well, I don’t live at the church. I have a life outside of it, at least I’d like to. So would my wife and kids. Know how hard it is to hear you say “we’d love to give you a raise but it’s just not in the budget” when I see you buying your daughter a horse for Xmas and your son a $4,000 Italian racing bike, and I’m wondering if we can buy groceries and still buy shoes for our kids! No Christmas bonus for us for five years and you’re taking your family to Disney for the umpteenth time! Hell yeah I’m coveting. Meanwhile your kids rub my kids’ faces in it each and every Sunday, while I try to teach mine to take the high road.

Inside, I want to know how you sleep at night. I want to know how you look at me with that shit-eating cheesy grin every Sunday when you know you’d make the Ananias and Sapphira list in a heartbeat. You think my wife wouldn’t like to have something nice to wear? Think we wouldn’t mind going out every once in a while? Come to my house sometime. We live just down the street from you. Come see what we have and what we do without. What my children do without. And then consider that yours never do without–anything. And then ask yourself who could make the difference here. And it’s not me.

A pastor from Louisiana.

Rant with Us!

October 2, 2009 - Leave a Response

Churches are often hard places to work, serve, and even just attend. See, people are not nice all the time. They can be selfish, demeaning, and downright awful to the people who are more often than not just trying to do a good thing for very little pay.

Pastors are in the worst spot because they can’t be “human” and are often stuck up on an unfair pedestal of purity. So like an old fashioned teapot, they can get to the boiling point quickly. But they are not allowed to lose any steam and heat. So you just got to keep it inside until the pressure settles down.

Well that ain’t healthy. So why not have a spot for a little anonymous pressure release?

That’s what The Ranting Pastor is all about. It’s a service for the “Gawdly” who are forced to walk in righteousness when all they want is a good beer (or other beverage) and a friend to cuss with once in a while.

So, here’s what you do now that I have your attention:

  • Go to and follow
  • It’s a private account so no one will know what you are posting unless they have been approved to join in the fun (and therapy).
  • Send only a direct message to The Ranting Pastor or the whole privacy thing is blown! If you happen to tweet The Ranting Pastor by mistake, just remove it, and send a direct message instead. The way, The Ranting Pastor can protect your privacy in the name of Jesus!
  • The only people who can see what you post are the other friends of The Ranting Pastor which you can see in the following list.
  • Unless someone is looking over your shoulder, you are safe.

But why the hell should I trust you, Anonymous Ranting person?

  • Good question. Just contact me and I might share with ya! See? All you have to do is ask.